Looking for opinions of new training technique used on my young border collie. Last night I decided to train Talin on his sit-stays for agility, he is terrible, as he is over-stimulated by the obstacles and impossible to control. A fellow dog club member offered to help me. I respect her knowledge and the results she has had with her young cattle dog. I put him in a sit-stay and started to walk past the first obstacle, as soon as I get a few feet away, he starts to lift his butt, and then its only a second or two and he's off ! My friend says to go straight back to him, grab him by his fur around his neck with both hands , raise his face up to mine and yell " AHHHH " with my eyes fixed on his eyes, for several seconds. I did this a few times with average results. She wanted to teach him, and did this many times, after a little while he started to look very scared, and was looking over his shoulder to me many times. He lost all drive to do any agility obstacles, and eventually ran back to me and hid behind me, after she asked for a fifth recall. By the end of the night he was definatley doing solid sit-stays, but looked more out of fear than anything else. On the drive home, he kept starring at me. I reassured him with a pat every now and then till we got home. At home my wife asked him to come to her, ( he has always come straight away ) he wouldn't go to her, and dipped his head looking scared. Has he started to disslike women ?? I'm told by many at the club, that I am far too soft with my dogs. I don't raise my voice or physicaly handle my other agility dog, because she simply does everything I ask her to do, she is also sensitive and will almost cry at a " naughty girl " spoken. Talin is very different, confident, self-assured and very high-drive. My question is....is this methode harsh handling and would I have more problems with him being psychologically damaged if I continue. The results are there , but is it worth it ?