tonight, lily ate her food with dandy lying down not even two feet away. she tried to pick it up and run off, but i blocked her, then patted her and spoke softly while she stared at me fixedly, then she looked at dandy, looked at me, looked at him for a long moment, then her entire body melted and she calmly finished eating her food. she tensed up both times dandy reached toward her with his nose sniffing, but when i corrected dandy, she relaxed instantly. she didn't interrupt or change the pace of her chewing, though (didn't speed it up or slow it down, i mean). i was also able to have both her and dandy on my lap pretty much throughout the day with minimal growling and snapping from her - a few growls, but only one attempt to snap at dandy. he's a groomer - likes to sniff and clean ears and the fur down the spine - and she doesn't like him touching her. this behaviour actually improved most once i corrected her sharply for trying to mount him (nothing physical, just a stern voice and facial expression and when she still wouldn't get off him, i prodded her in the chest until she hopped off). dandy was surprisingly good - he clearly didn't like it but his normal reaction is to do a fast spin - that would've thrown her off and could've hurt her but he let me deal with her.